WHAT'S YOUR SOUTHERN SIGN?

> > Some Southerners are

> > pretty skeptical of horoscopes and the people that

> > read them. If we are to ever fully understand all the

> > star signs and the people they represent, we need

> > symbols that all true Southerners understand

********************************************

> >

> > OKRA (Dec 22 - Jan 20) Are tough on the outside but

> > tender on the inside. Okras have tremendous influence.

> > An older Okra can look back over his life and see the

> > seeds of his influence everywhere. You can do

> > something good each day if you try.

> >

> > CHITLIN (Jan 21 - Feb 19) Chitlins come from humble

> > backgrounds. A Chitlin, however, will make something

> > of himself if he is motivated and has lots of

> > seasoning. In dealing with Chitlins, be careful they

> > may surprise you. They can erupt like Vesuvius.

> > Chitlins are best with Catfish and Okra.

> >

> > BOLL WEEVIL (Feb 20 - March 20) You have an

> > overwhelming curiosity. You're unsatisfied with the

> > surface of things, and you feel the need to bore deep

> > into the interior of everything. Needless to say, you

> > are very intense and driven as if you had some inner

> > hunger. You love to stay busy and tend to work too

> > much. Nobody in their right mind is going to marry

> > you, so don't worry about it.

> >

> > MOON PIE (March 21 - April 20) You're the type that

> > spends a lot of time on the front porch. A cinch to

> > recognize the physical appearance of Moon Pies. Big

> > and round are the key words here. You should marry

> > anybody who you can get remotely interested in the

> > idea. It's not going to be easy. You always have a big

> > smile and are happy. This might be the year to think

> > about aerobics Maybe not.

> >

> > POSSUM (April 21 - May 21) When confronted with life's

> > difficulties, possums have a marked tendency to

> > withdraw and develop a

> > don't-bother-me-about-it attitude. Sometimes you

> > become so withdrawn, people actually think you're

> > dead. This strategy is probably not psychologically

> > healthy but seems to work for you. You are a rare

> > breed. Most folks love to watch you work and play. You

> > are a night person and mind your own business.

> >

> > CRAWFISH (May 22 - June 21) Crawfish is a water sign.

> > If you work in an office, you're hanging around the

> > water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the

> > mountains, the pool to the golf course, and the

> > bathtub to the living room. You tend not to be

> > particularly attractive physically, but you have very,

> > very good heads.

> >

> > COLLARDS (June 22 - July 23) Collards have a genius

> > for communication. They love to get in the melting pot

> > of life and share their essence with the essence of

> > those around them. Collards make good social workers,

> > psychologists, and baseball managers. As far as your< BR>personal life

> goes,

> > if you are Collards, stay away

> > from Crawfish. It just won't work. Save yourself a lot

> > of heartache.

> >

> > CATFISH (July 24 - Aug 23) Catfish are traditionalists

> > in matters of the heart, although one's whiskers may

> > cause problems for loved ones. You Catfish are never

> > easy people to understand. You run fast. You work and

> > play hard. Even though you prefer the muddy bottoms to

> > the clear surface of life, you are liked by most.

> > Above all else, Catfish should stay away from Moon

> > Pies.

> >

> > GRITS (Aug 24 - Sept 23) Your highest aim is to be

> > with others like yourself You like to huddle together

> > with a big crowd of other Grits. You love to travel

> > though, so maybe you should think about joining a

> > club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have

> > cheese, gravy, bacon, butter, or eggs and a good time.

> > If you can! go somewhere where they have all these

> > things, that serves you well. You are pure in heart.

> >

> > BOILED PEANUTS (Sept 24 - Oct 23) You have a

> > passionate desire to help your fellow man.

> > Unfortunately, those who know you best, your friends

> > and loved ones, may find that your personality is much

> > too salty, and their criticism will affect you deeply

> > because you are really much softer than you appear.

> > You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want

> > to because in a certain way, yours is a charmed life.

> > On the road of life, you can be sure that people will

> > always pull over and stop for you.

> >

> > BUTTER BEAN (Oct 24 - Nov 22) Always invite a Butter

> > Bean to a party because Butter! Beans get along well

> > with everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be

> > proud. You've grown on the vine of life, and you feel

> > at home no matter what the setting. You can sit next

> > to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything

> > to do with Moon Pies.

> >

> > ARMADILLO (Nov 23 - Dec 21) You have a tendency to

> > develop a tough exterior, but you are actua lly quite

> > gentle and kind inside. A good evening for you? Old

> > friends, a fire, some roots, fruit, worms, and

> > insects. You are a throwback. You're not concerned

> > with today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned

> > with anything about today. You're almost prehistoric

> > in your interests and behavior patterns. You probably

> > want to marry another Armadillo, but a Possum is

> > another somewhat kinky mating possibility.

>

*********************************

Now there's a first. Guess there's always a new way to look at old things!