Marion! We are kindred spirits indeed!
My mother's training says: "Be nice!" , while the inherent nature of my father
wants to say "that so-and-so is a BUM!" HeeHEE!!!
My mother (God bless her!) was truly a living saint. People would come up to me all the time & say : "do you know that your mother's is the nicest person I've ever known". She was an elementary school teacher (a BORN teacher!) when she met Dad and left teaching to be wife
and mother. My Dad admired her intelligence & loved her for her sweet & patient nature.
Everyone who knew her loved her. She was so caring, and had tremendous
Faith & inner strength. Dad used to always say that after he took her to meet his mother, Grandma Marion said: "Francis, be good to Helen. She is a VERY nice girl!"
Indeed she was and also the perfect counterpart to him. Where her loving nature was
readily apparent, Dad's love need to be "understood" (sort of like reading Morse Code).
Whenever we got sick as kids, Ma would take care of you - but Dad did NOT want you to
be sick. If he came in from work & you were in pajamas on the couch, he'd peer silently
at you for awhile and then demand to know: "Are you SICK, dear????". I quickly figured out that there was
one or two responses that you could give to Dad's question. If you answered "Yes, Daddy",
he'd peer at you intently & then hollar "Helen! HELEN! Is she SICK???" and while
my mother replied from the kitchen: "Yes Frank she has a cold", my father would continue
to stare at you as if he expected you to keel over any minute & then finally go in search of Helen (his Rock Of Gibraltar) in the kitchen. Despite all evidence to the contrary (kleenex boxes, runny nose, rash etc), if you answered "No Daddy", he'd nod his head & say :Good!
GOOD, dear!" and appear completely satisfied. So funny!
My father's chief expression & offering of love was his work for us. He worked 3 jobs and never asked for a single thing for himself. There's a wonderful Gaelic
prayer that says "For my father who raised me by the work of his bones".
I know of no other sentence that expresses it so well. As a child it's not understood or
appreciated as it should be, but eventually you come to understand the full truth of it.
And the cost.
You were SO young when you lost your Dad, but oh how proud he must be of you!
Look at how much you've given to so many people because of him.
Sweet ARE the uses of adversity, indeed. I could tell you a million stories about
that in my own life.
We DO need beers! When do you think that the net will progress to the point where
we can click on "beer" and get it? We'd order BEERS all around for VI CORps buddies!".
Mary Ann